Family (Members) Who Are Like Friends

I love the anticipation and excitement that welcoming visitors over our house brings. The food planning, the sprucing of spaces in the house, the rehabilitation of the toy room turned into the guest bedroom. It is all very fun for me -especially when those visitors happen to be very special.

My cousin recently moved to a city about three hours away from us. We haven’t had much contact for a while because we both were living in countries other than Mexico and when I went back home to visit, we seldom crossed paths.

I remembered him kindly, however. His parents are my godparents and growing up his house was basically a second home for me. Him and I were always dreaming or debating about something and then our different interests landed us in places far away from home.

It wasn’t until I heard he was living in the U.S. that I reached out to him and learned of his move closer to me. We decided to meet up in person next time I was over by him. When we did, we each had a whole set of people attached to us. I didn’t know how things were going to be, but him and my husband seemed to hit it off so well that we ended up making plans together for Thanksgiving.

I struggled to hold back the tears of excitement when his little family came through the door of our house. It was the first time ever that we had welcomed any family for a holiday since I had lived in the States. I wanted it to be perfect and for everybody, young and not, to have the funnest of all times.

There is only so much you can do as a hostess for the group dynamic to flow gracefully: the linens were clean, the guest bathroom had all the major necessities, and I made sure the four new people in our home had a space that they could use as their own. I included my cousin’s wife in the food planning and preparation and tried for everyone to feel just at home. But even if you plan everything perfectly, if there is no chemistry between people, there isn’t any welcoming cocktail that could replace it.

Luckily for us, we found ourselves enjoying the holiday in great harmony. The kitchen was the center of the main interactions. Where I got to know my cousin’s wife and discovered just how much we have in common. As the aromas of the food surrounded us, also the air of emerging friendships invaded the kitchen. My cousin and I reconnected and found common ground in parenthood. My husband and my cousin’s wife chatted over wine and cheese. The kids ran around the house playing together as if they had known each other for a long time. It was a scene worthy of a postcard!

We debated politics and the need for winter gear in the Midwest; we exchanged parenting tips and questioned the same practices of disengaged parents at playgrounds; we laughed and shared stories that made us teary-eyed. Three languages danced together to make great conversations as we shared a common identity of being multi-cultural families racing children in a country foreign to us all.

We talked and we ate and we played and we enjoyed the comfort of being in great company. So I start this holiday season with a big smile on my face and the pleasant taste of having family nearby vibrating all over me. I’m thankful for magical and unforgettable moments surrounded by great people and for realizing that while there are friends who are like family, there also are family members who are like friends.

 

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