ForeignMom's Blog

Bicultural mom adjusting to motherhood in a foreign country

Learning to Use the Calendar June 30, 2010

Who knew calendars would be such an intrinsic part of my social life? Of course one needs to depend on dates to mark birthdays and celebrations but  now that I’m back from vacation (where I was free of any routine or schedule), I find myself, once again, checking my calendar and my schedule before making ANY type of plans.

That should come second-nature by now, right? After all, I’ve been living in the US for 8 years. Truth be told, I’m still having trouble getting used to planning for everything ahead of time. I was very used to deadlines and planning in the business world, but when it comes to socializing, I still have my foreign attitude and love to be a spur-of-the-moment type of girl.

I guess living in my home country for the first 17 years of my life didn’t prepare me too well to adapt to a time-oriented culture. And how could I be prepared if I come from a relationship-oriented culture where we enjoy to do everything (even going to the bank) accompanied by someone?

I really try to remind myself: “When in Rome do as the Romans” but I’m definitely a slacker in the pre-planning area. Nevertheless, I am trying to rewire my brain to be a more time-oriented person so I can be successful in my quest of meeting more people and making friends during my stay-at-home-mom time.

I have to admit that since I joined a mom club in my area, I have been very lucky to have many things to do thanks to their calendar of events and their time-oriented structure, so I guess calendars are not always too bad. It is the time in between those events and playdates that is hard for me to deal with. I try to convince myself to stop comparing the before and now, but when I lived back home, I could just text one of my friends and ask if we could meet up in 10 minutes. The answer was always yes, although sometimes it meant to meet up outside their doctor’s office or some other random place to go for a coffee after they were done with their previous commitment. I really miss that flexibility and always having someone to call up.

Maybe I will meet someone with a very open calendar like me or maybe I will finally embrace social scheduling. In the mean time, if you are bored, you are one of my Facebook contacts and you want to meet up, always feel free to call.

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One Response to “Learning to Use the Calendar”

  1. Nellie Says:

    I completely agree with you, I also miss those days of being able to just meet up somewhere. And I look forward to those days again where I can call up a friend and say lets go grab a drink or even a pedicure! Right now I feel like in order to go anywhere the grocery store even, I need 30 minutes to prepare, snacks, clothes, possible change of clothes, and even then I’m late, and I forget something! I often wonder where I am going wrong


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